Maintaining friendships with newborns?

I am female, my best friend is male, and him and his wife are expecting their first baby soon. I expect our friendship to change as from what I understand a newborn can take up a lot of time, but I'm concerned our friendship will end because of it. We have discussed it and agree not to let it come to that, but I can't help but be concerned. I am fully prepared to be supportive during this time (and all the times to come!) but I just read so many things about how people with new babies don't have time to maintain their friendships. I can't imagine this being the case with us, but I was curious as to other people's experiences (from both ends) on maintaining friendships when having a little one, especially from a different gender perspective. I do not have children myself, but am also married, if this matters to anyone. It definitely changes when you have a baby. I have a newborn and have not really talked to any of my friends in weeks because I am so busy with him. Since your friend is the male maybe he will be a little more flexible since no nursing and so on... Most likely it will resume once the baby is more independent all you can do is be there for him and offer him and his wife help. Hang in there:)

well... so long as you are supportive and very understanding this shouldnt be a problem. most of my friendships (male and female) have ceased to exist because until you have children you just dont know how demanding they are. his life is about to do a total 180 and there is nothing you or he can do about it. there are alot of times i am just too tired or too frazzled to even think about calling a friend. thats life. your going to have to be very very understanding and patient. baby will come first, no matter how many times you have had plans and he has had to cancel them!

I have children and I can say when my first was born I lost a lot of friendships. I was the first one out of my group of friends to have a baby and they had a hard time understanding that my baby came first no matter what.

If you want your friendship to work you need to know that their baby will come before any and all plans that you have made and if they have to cancel on you be cool about it.

Being a new parent is hard! When the baby is born be a support to them. Bring them dinner offer to lend a helping hand! Just get involved!

I can understand how you feel to some extent. My husband and I don't have many friends but we try to keep tough with them when possible. One way that you can help maintain your friendship and still see them is to offer to babysit once in a while. That will make them feel great that you want to help them; a true friend! Take them out to eat once she is ready to go out with the baby. Stop by in the evening so the new family can relax and make them a nice dinner or help clean their house. All of those things will be so helpful and will allow your friendship to grow with the new addition.

It will change a lot and communication may dwindle a little, but when you put forth a genuine effort things will be ok. Eventually there will be a point that the baby is old enough and won't be nearly as needy/dependent as they are in the beginning. It'll work out, just have faith!

You can still be friends, but your friendship may change.

When I had my first baby, I took him everywhere with me and my friends were cool with me bringing him along. Newborns are easy to take with you and require little attention while you're out. Toddlers on the other hand require much more attention.

Some of their interests will shift and you may not see them as often, but you can still be friends.

A good friend that I've had since before kids also has kids now. The difference is that now to get together with her, we have to book 3 weeks in advance and I only see her about once every three months, but this works for both of us as she is really busy too. We will pick up right where we left off

I think that if you are really supportive of her and her baby that your friendship should endure. How to be supportive? After she has the baby, offer to come over and do the dishes and wash her floors or do a couple loads of laundry. The best thing my friend did just before I was due was make me a half dozen frozen casseroles. Those things were a life saver and if you can make them in disposable containers even better. Or invite her to your house for a chance to get out and do something low-key.

As far as 'people who have babies don't have time to maintain friendships', I think that they don't have time for needy friends who need to speak every day and get together once a week. Maybe what is more accurate is to say that they don't have as much time.

You need to know that his responsibility is to his wife and his newborn. For a new mother having a new baby is so hard! You just got through lugged around a baby inside for 9 months, plenty of sleepless night while pregnant, intense labor, delivery, and now she is exhausted, swollen, and in so much pain. On top of that all she has to take care of a newborn 24/7! Meaning.. breastfeeding (or bottle,) sleepless nights, dealing with a colicy baby, plenty of laundry, so many bottles to clean. No time to shower or get yourself together. It's crazy! She will need her husband to help so she can keep her sanity. So if that means less time with you for a few months then you should be okay with that. Once the baby gets on a baby schedual which could only take a couple months or could take a lot longer you guys could most likely resume where you left off.

I used to hate it when my baby's father would go off with his friends (female friends made me even mader) and leave me with our son. He had all the fun he wanted and I took care of our son 24/7. I was a complete mess. Do her a favor and chill for a while. Go out with other friends.

Don't stop calling them because they turned you down a few times. My friends don't invite me anywhere anymore because I couldn't go a few times. I didn't want to leave my baby with anyone cause I felt she was too young. Now.....I want to go to movies, dinner, etc but I don't get calls anymore :(